I’m a pretty talkative person. And after a few glasses of wine, I’m very talkative. So, there have been many an occasion where I have hopped in a cab or a car service (thank God for Uber… how did we survive before??) for a quick ride home after a glass or two four.
Some of the drivers just sit there, quietly taking you to your destination, others ask about your day. But most of the time, if you give them real answers and ask real questions, they respond. And I am intrigued by these conversations more often than not.
Usually its a man in his 30’s or 40’s, who is doing his best to provide for his family, save for a trip, buy a home. Many talk of sending money back to family in some country I have never heard of it (but probably should know) and to be honest, I often marvel at their knowledge of current events, political situations, the stock market, a myriad of other things.
Fast forward to last night: I get into a car after a networking event, somewhat tired and overdone, longing for my bed and my driver commented after my fifth yawn “Did you have a long day, miss?”. First, major points for calling me miss and not ma’am. I like him already.
We got into a discussion about long days, social obligations, and eventually our chat led to the recent happenings in the world, some not so good and down-right scary (like bombs and planes crashing and people having no sense of obligation to one another) and somehow we landed on the topic of children (I know, you’re probably thinking this was like a 40-minute car ride, more like 12. We got comfortable real quick, Rahim and I).
We talked comfortably and casually and I found myself saying to him, not even knowing I was thinking it, “I just don’t even know if I could bring kids into this world. How do you explain to them all these awful things? How do you protect them from that?”
He said that you create relationships with your family and your neighbors and you all look out for one another, for one another’s kids, for one another’s well being. That you create a group of people you trust and you all raise your children together. With values you all live by and teach them to live by.
Our conversation continued and eventually we pulled up at my house. I reached up and shook his hand, said goodbye. And as he was shaking my hand, he held on to it for a moment and said to me:
“Don’t be afraid to have kids, they’ll be good people when they’re your kids”.
Not too shabby for a guy I met twelve minutes ago.
Not So Desperate in the City 